Burnout Isn’t a Personal Problem, It’s a Systemic One
Let’s get this out of the way: burnout is not your fault.
Yes, you’re tired. Yes, you’re overextended. Yes, you might be procrastinating, snapping at your partner, zoning out in meetings, or fantasizing about quitting everything to run away to a cabin in the woods. But that doesn’t mean you’re broken.
Burnout isn’t a personal failing. It’s the result of systems that don’t support human beings. And no, more bubble baths or mindfulness apps or hot walks are not going to solve the root cause.
What Burnout Actually Is
Burnout isn’t just being tired. It’s a chronic state of emotional, physical, and mental depletion caused by unrelenting stress—and the absence of meaningful relief or resolution.
Emily and Amelia Nagoski, authors of Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle, talk about how burnout happens not just because of stressors, but because we don’t get to complete the stress cycle. In other words: the pressure builds, but we never get to release it.
They use a simple but powerful metaphor: your body is like a tunnel. Stress moves through it. But when we ignore that stress—when we keep grinding and producing and striving without ever signaling to our bodies that the threat is over—we get stuck. We burn out. We become a painted tunnel that a coyote can smack straight into.
You and Wil E. Coyote have a lot in common right now.
It’s not about being weak. It’s about being trapped.
Why We Keep Burning Out
Because the systems we work in aren’t designed for sustainability. They’re designed for output.
When the only thing that matters is productivity, everything else becomes optional. Rest becomes indulgent. Boundaries become selfish. Emotional well-being becomes an afterthought.
Even worse? Burnout is often celebrated. Overworking gets praised. People who pull late nights and power through exhaustion get rewarded with more responsibility. We don’t call it a crisis, we call it “being a team player.”
And if you crash? There’s a wellness webinar and a gift card for a massage and maybe a gentle suggestion that you should try yoga.
That’s not a solution. That’s a Band-Aid on a bullet wound.
The Real Fix Isn’t Self-Care—It’s Structural Change
Self-care can be a useful tool for navigating stress, but it doesn’t address why the stress is happening in the first place.
If the expectations are unreasonable, the hours are unsustainable, the support is nonexistent, and the culture discourages honesty…. of course people are burning out.
Here’s what actual burnout prevention looks like:
Clear priorities and realistic workloads
Managers who know how to lead humans, not just projects
Space to rest, recover, and say "no" without punishment
Teams that talk openly about stress, capacity, and mental health
Boundaries that are respected, not negotiated every week
And yes, personal practices matter. Completing the stress cycle through movement, connection, creativity, laughter, even crying or screaming (I personally VERY much prefer screaming) is critical. But it only works when the systems allow people the time and space to actually do those things.
You Don’t Have to Accept This
If you’re burned out right now, you don’t need to push harder. You need to ask better questions:
What’s fueling this stress, and why does it never end?
What do I need more of and what do I need less of?
Where are the system-level issues that keep setting me up to fail?
You don’t need to be more productive. You need to be supported.
At The Threadsmith Group, we help people and organizations name what’s really happening underneath burnout and build systems that support people, not just performance.
You’re not weak. You’re just working in conditions that are too much, too often, for too long. Let’s change that.